My Son Let Me Cut His Hair!! (#Autism)

Most kids with Autism HATE having their hair cut, and my son is no different. For the last few years, cutting my son’s hair would mean I would have to hold my son on my lap by wrapping him in a sheet so he couldn’t move (which is REALLY difficult…he’s 7.5 years old and more than 80lbs!), while my man uses the hair clippers set on buzz-mode, and trying to help me keep my son still. Not an easy thing…and usually myself or my son would end up bleeding because of how much he was moving, trying to escape.

 

When my kids was 5 years old, they both caught lice at daycare. My daughter’s thin and strawberry blond hair was easy to get the dark lice out. Plus, she would sit still. I almost cried at the thought of going through my son’s hair. There was no way he would sit still for me to meticulously go through his hair to get rid of the lice. He had longish gorgeous thick dirty-blond hair, and it had to go. My man didn’t understand why we had to wait for my neighbour to get home from work so we could cut his hair. Why wouldn’t a man who’s 6’2″ be able to manage this, with me clipping his hair? He didn’t understand…until he sat on the floor with my son on his lap, holding him and my little 5 year old spun the two of them in circles on the floor. My man couldn’t stop him. So we waited an hour or so for my neighbour to come home and help. Took two hours and three grown ups to buzz off my son’s hair. We were all exhausted, I was bleeding a bit, but we did it.

 

Fast forward about 2 years and about bunch of home-haircuts. We were able to get it down to just my man and I. We also had one great cut where I barely had to hold him on my lap, and he fussed but no one was bleeding or exhausted at the end. Then the next one happened and he was screaming, crying and back to what we believed as being his “normal” for a haircut. We went through it and did it. Then about a week later, my man asked me to “clean up” the bottom of his haircut so, out came the clippers. I was scared because my only experience with cutting hair was with my son. I barely touched him with the clippers, and he was flinching. I told him I had barely touched him, he looked at the clippers, and realized it was off-kilter. Ah-ha! THAT’s why my son had freaked out the week prior.

 

Fast forward another 6 months or so, and it’s time to cut his hair again. In fact, we had been putting off doing it for so long that his hair was getting some of the curl back! I told the therapists at IBI how scared I was, and they told me that they can create a desensitizing program for him. He responded really well to the program but I was still scared.

 

Today and yesterday, my son’s been home sick. This afternoon, he’s getting back to his normal, making all of his crazy noises,  moving around a bit, and has some colour again in his cheeks. He asked for his “footnails” (which is code for wanting me to cut his toe nails…how cute is that??). I went over to him, asked which one needed to be cut, and he pushed the nail clippers towards the back of his head. I laughed and pretended to cut his hair with the nail clippers. He didn’t move. He even took his hat off (which doesn’t happen for anything except for bathtime!). So, I grabbed the scissors from the kitchen and pretended to cut the back of his hair, being very careful in case he whipped his head around. He didn’t move. I asked if I could cut his hair near his ears (his sideburns) with the scissors and he said “Yes”. So I did. Then I pulled hair between my fingers the way I’ve seen hairdressers do, and started doing sections around his head. He let me do it! Every few minutes, he would put his hat back on, and I would ask him if I can cut more, he would take his hat off, and let me continue. I did his whole head!! Still some bits I can see to cut off now that he’s moved around this afternoon, but I now we can do it.

 

I’m sssoooooo proud of him (and it looks really good, if I may say so…my first time cutting hair)!!!!

#Autism Brain

When my son makes this play on his iPad:

He then draws this:

Not sure why, but it fascinates me each and every time! He concentrates so hard on what he’s drawing, and is very meticulous with each and every stroke.

New #PTPA Member

I’m so excited to be a new member of the Panel of Blogaholics with the PTPA (Parent Tested, Parent Approved). The PTPA is the largest parent-testing community and seal of approval recognized worldwide. Here is my introduction as a Blogaholic:

“I’m single mom of 7 year old boy/girl twins. My son has Autism. My daughter has Anxiety Disorder. I’m also very happy to still have a relationship with my 18 year old stepdaughter, despite being divorced from her father. She has Asperger’s and Mysophonia. BUT, my kids are so much more than their respective diagnoses.”

Read the rest of my intro here. I’ll admit that I’m so excited to be part of the Blogaholics, that I actually had butterflies in my tummy when I posted my introduction!

 

I encourage you to sign up to become a PTPA tester for products here.

 

If you have a product you would like tested by the panel of PTPA testers, check it out here. As always though, if you are hoping for just me to review your product, feel free to contact me directly.

 

After School #MeTime, While The Kids Where Home?!!

My son’s new after school routine (within the last month and a half or so) is to get out of the car, run to the driveway of our neighbour 3 doors down, run back, play with his shadow, and then hang out on another neighbour’s porch for a while. Some days, he can be there for a good hour or so. If those neighbours are outside, and needing to go in and out of their front door, they just say hi, move around him and head inside.  They even asked after we moved in late last summer how to communicate with him!  How awesome are our neighbours?!

 

Until now, this after school routine has been a bit difficult for me, trying to keep an eye on him while my daughter is going in and out of our home, and honestly, trying to find somewhere comfortable for me to be for the hour or so he takes for this routine…especially when it’s raining (and the couple of days it snowed). A couple of days ago however, my man’s parents gave us some new-to-us lawn chairs and table (they’re even my favourite colour: green!).  While my son did his routine last night, I was able to bring backpacks and everything inside, get the kids an after school snack, and make myself a chai. I then sat down in our new chairs on the front porch with my feet up, reading my book (shocking that it’s about Autism!), drinking my chai and still being able to keep an eye on my son.

A bonus too, is the view of and lovely fragrance resulting from the bush in my front yard:

Not a bad routine to have to “endure” each and every day!

#Momstown Guelph

 I’m happy to be speaking at Momstown Guelph on June 26th from 10am – 11am. I’ll be speaking about what to do when you believe there is something different with your child, and how to support a mom-friend who has a child with special needs.

Our First Attempt at #Gardening

Last week, the kids and I planted some seeds in peat pods to start germinating our garden in our new home. The peat pods before doing anything with them:

Then we added water, as per the directions.

      (22 degrees Celsius and my son still wants to wear his mittens!)

The pods would start to float so my daughter would carefully push them down so they wouldn’t float away:

 

Then we started planting the seeds.

           

Our final product…we did it! We planted a bunch of veggies in one greenhouse, flowers in another. We have more seeds coming soon too so there will be more greenhouses.

Then we planted lavendar and basil in a planter for our porch too. The lavendar is in the middle circle drawn in the dirt, surrounded by basil. We’ll see if it works that way:

So exciting that only a couple of days later, the seeds in the peat pods are already starting to sprout. If only my son would agree with me as to where to put the mini greenhouses…they seem to have a passport around our dining room and living room with him moving them where ever he wants to.

Picky Eaters…but what about #SpecialNeeds eaters?

I went to a moms group this morning that meets twice a month. This morning’s speaker (who is absolutely fantastic and an amazing woman!) spoke about picky eaters. Needless to say, the room was filled with more moms than usual. It’s obviously a huge issue. There were some great ideas and suggestions, including replacing the terms “like” and “dislikes” with “I’m hungry enough” or “not hungry enough” when asking for snacks, etc. The speaker suggested telling your kids to try new foods by saying “someday you may like that food, and today could be that day”. Expect your children to at least try a taste of whatever food so they can determine if today is that day.

 

We started the meeting with brainstorming what the “go to” meals are for families. I even asked the questions on my Facebook Page. I looked at the list when the room was finished and just shook my head. I WISH my kids would eat even half of the meals people listed. I can list off why my son or daughter would or would not eat most of these meals.

During the presentation, I thought they were all great ideas…however, how do I translate the suggestions to my kiddos, both of which have sensory issues? My son needs all food to be specific shapes EXCEPT for when it’s crazy processed foods like chips…of course that’s when shapes don’t seem to come into play at all. My daughter can’t handle ANY kind of spices or herbs. Even salt, pepper or italiano herb mixture is too much for her. She says pizza sauce hurts her so she eats garlic bread/Crazy Bread while her brother and I eat pizza. If I eat something with lemon pepper or other spices in it, she complains that it hurts her nose and one of us has to move across the room.

 

It wasn’t until my man started cooking for us that I actually realized that the 3 of us eat different versions or completely different foods for each meal. It stressed him out because his son will eat everything he makes (and sometimes bigger quantities depending on growth-spurt status!)…but it was just “normal” for me to make different things for each meal.

 

When the kids were really young, I mentioned my concern about my kids’ restrictive diets, especially my son’s. He spent about 2 years eating only fruit, rice cakes and pizza. That was it. The fruit didn’t bother me obviously, but rice cakes are really high in sodium, especially that my son would only eat the basil & tomato kind. The pizza wasn’t so bad because I could hide spinach and vegetables in the tomato sauce but still had pepperoni on it. The doctor wasn’t concerned because my son was healthy and growing fast so his diet wasn’t restricting his growth. I met with the dietitian at my doctor’s office too, and she was surprised to find a huge blackhole in the nutrition field specific to kids with special needs. As a parent, I know the Canadian Food Guide and I told her that before out meeting. Her research discovered that it’s not a nutrition thing, it’s a behavioural and desensitizing thing  for our kids on the Autism Spectrum.

 

So my question still remains though…how do I incorporate some of the great ideas I heard today to increase the diet for my sensory sensitive kids?

30 Days of Pictures of #Autism

How the table was arranged “before” at a birthday party my kids were invited to on the weekend:

How the table was arranged “after” my son got at it:

Always the little organizer.

30 Days of Pictures of #Autism

Look what poster is up at my son’s IBI.

The Most Important Part of a Parenting Plan is YOU (#AutismParentingMagazine)

I’m happy to be writing for a relatively new online magazine called Autism Parenting Magazine. They publish on iPad newstands, and soon will be available on Kindle and Android. This month’s magazine theme is “all things related to therapy”.  My article:

I attended the local monthly autism support group this week. Normally, there has been two or three families but this week, there were nine different families; some of us who have been on the journey for a while, and two who just received diagnosis (last month!), and one who has been fighting for diagnosis for seven years (SEVEN YEARS!!) and is still fighting. There were lots of tears. Tears of being overwhelmed by the “newbies”; tears of understanding from us “veterans.”

One of the newbies is a grandmother to the little one who has been diagnosed. She has been a superstar and went through everything to get diagnosis for her grandson, while her daughter (the child’s mother) is still in denial that there’s anything “wrong” with her son. The child lives with his mom, and grandmother is very involved. Superstar grandmother!
While shedding tears, grandmother confided in the group that she’s worried about doing something “wrong” with her grandson but she refuses to keep him hidden from the world. He still needs to experience everything…grocery shopping, park, playing with other kids, etc. She asked the group what the best thing is to help support her grandson. I spoke up…love him, and get support for yourself, too.

As parents (grandparents/caregivers), we are so good at searching out for the newest and “best” therapies, tools and strategies for our children. I argue there’s something different we need to ensure is in place in all parenting plans for all parents’ of kids with special needs: Look after yourself too!

Subscribe through your iPad Newstand or click here to read the rest of the article (pages 17 and 18).

Also, be sure to “Like” Autism Parenting Magazine and my blog (if you haven’t already) on Facebook.